Wednesday, May 19, 2010
The month of MAY !!!
It has been a really tough month for me this month.
The month of May is really a very tough period of time for me.
Jeffrey left me for Taiwan on the 4Th of MAY at 12am!
That very moment at the airport it was really a very tough time for me.
I really wanted to cry but i didn't have the courage to cry out loud!
Jeffrey's parents was there to send him off too!
I made a promise to Jeffrey that i will not let him see me cry but deep down inside i was really crying very badly.
I thought i could take it easy, i thought that everything was going to be fine!
I really thought that 1 month was no big deal but i was wrong.
This month of MAY have been the slowest month ever!
Every single day I'm counting down like a mad women.
I'm sending text messages to him like every single day be it whether he will receive the text messages a not.
I totally understand that he is really busy in Taiwan and that he can't accompany me all the way like how he used to accompany me when he is in Singapore.
I understand that he is always tired and stressed up but i just can't help but feel very left out by him.
I only receive 1 phone call a day at 10 plus every night and we would only talk for about 15 minutes the most.
I understand that overseas call are really expensive but i really just want him to spent more time with me.
I left M.A.C already and I'm like currently looking for another job!
I just can't concentrate on anything else.
My phone never leave my sight at all, it's 24/7 with me!
I'm so afraid that i might miss his phone call while I'm bathing or while I'm charging my phone in the room so I'm always hugging onto my phone.
My parents and Younger sister is in China for the week and I'm all alone at home with my younger brother and my maid. It's so hard for me when the place is really quiet. I took my sleeping pills like 8pm every night, hoping that by 10 I'll be tired but still every night i can't get to sleep.
I have been falling sick really frequently this month i seriously don't know why and don't understand why.
I have no appetite to eat or to do anything at all!
I reach home at 6pm everyday and watch television till 9pm and i will lay in bed and only fall asleep at 12 plus !
Life have been really boring and meaningless for me during this month of MAY!
Parents are away for the week and i have to help them keep a look out in the office.
Wake up at 7.30am every morning and wait for my uncle to come fetch both my younger brother and I.
I'll leave the office early and head home early to rest in the evening.
I do nothing but watch movies in the office, i fall asleep very often while watching movies!
I really miss Jeffrey alot and I'm really thankful that i have RuiHan and Justin around to talk to me often and to keep me company whenever I'm feeling down or lonely.
I seriously hope that the month of MAY can just end now!
I want Jeffrey back to my side.
There is so many things i wanna do with him!
12:35 PM
